Assalamu’alaikum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh

Bismillahir-Rahmanir-Rahim

1. Preface

Neuroscientifically, the human brain has a reward system highly sensitive to visual stimuli and social interaction. When a person begins “approaching” things that trigger lust—such as an unguarded gaze or overly free conversation—the brain releases large amounts of dopamine. This dopamine creates an “addictive” effect that dulls logic. Scientifically, it is difficult for a human to stop biological urges once they are already in the middle of the process. That is why the best method of prevention is to keep distance from the start, before the circuit of desire in the brain locks in completely.Allah SWT not only forbids the act, but firmly shuts every path leading to it:

وَلَا تَقْرَبُوا الزِّنٰىٓ اِنَّهٗ كَانَ فَاحِشَةًۗ وَسَاۤءَ سَبِيْلًا

“And do not approach unlawful sexual intercourse. Indeed, it is ever an immorality and an evil way.” (QS. Al-Isra’: 32)

The Messenger ﷺ also warned about the small stages often taken lightly yet ending in ruin:

فَالْعَيْنَانِ زِنَاهُمَا النَّظَرُ وَالأُذُنَانِ زِنَاهُمَا الاِسْتِمْعَاعُ وَاللِّسَانُ زِنَاهُ الْكَلاَمُ... وَالْقَلْبُ يَهْوَى وَيَتَمَنَّى وَيُصَدِّقُ ذَلِكَ الْفَرْجُ أَوْ يُكَذِّبُهُ

“…the zina of the eyes is looking, the zina of the ears is listening, the zina of the tongue is speaking… and the heart desires and wishes, then the private part confirms it or denies it.” (HR. Muslim)

2. Explanation

The true heroism of a believer lies in the ability to restrain oneself at the first step. Zina never happens suddenly; it is always preceded by an unnecessary smile, a gaze allowed to wander, or solitude (khalwat) that tears down the fortress of modesty. Closing these small gaps does not mean restricting freedom, but guarding human dignity so it does not fall into the depths of disgrace. Imagine a young man who carefully guards his gaze because he does not want to taint the sanctity of his future wife by enjoying beauty that is not his right now. He understands that loyalty begins long before marriage—by safeguarding the honor of others so that Allah will safeguard the honor of his own family.Desire is like a solid boulder at the top of a mountain. As long as the boulder sits at the peak, it is safe. But if you push it just ten meters down the slope, that boulder will not stop on its own; it will keep sliding with ever-increasing speed until it shatters in the deep valley below. Never underestimate the first push, because on the slope of desire, no brake is strong enough to stop the fall of self-respect. Often we hear people say, “Ah, it’s just a little chat with my ex—it won’t lead to zina!” This is like someone playing with matches next to a gasoline tank while calmly saying he only wants to see the flame. The problem is, fire doesn’t need your permission to ignite the fuel; it only needs to be close enough to trigger a massive explosion that destroys everything built.

3. Lessons and Message

The crucial lesson for us is that the most effective self-control is exercised at the starting point, not at the peak of temptation. The moral message: value yourself by setting firm boundaries. Purity is not only about guarding the body, but about guarding the mind and eyes from things that cloud the clarity of the soul. If you can win the small battle of the gaze, you have already won half the great battle of preserving honor.

4. Conclusion

Beloved brothers and sisters, everything starts from a small point: a glance, a smile, and the courage to reveal aurah. If we allow the first step to happen, the following steps become uncontrollable toward moral decline. Let us guard ourselves and our families by shutting the doors of “approaching.” Remember, it is better to be weary keeping distance than to be shattered from plunging to the bottom of the valley of disgrace.

. والله أعلم بالصواب

الحمد لله رب العالمين

Wassalamu’alaikum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh.

Oleh : Abu Sultan Al-Qadrie